“Your Highness, I’ve taken the liberty of scouring the whole of the Royal Empire to find you this enormous yellow apple,” he said, whipping it out with a flourish from behind his back.
I’m not royalty, and the object in his filthy hand was neither particularly yellow nor was it an apple. It was enormous though, and marked with purplish blotches beneath its waxy pallor.
I sat there on the log in the fading light, next to the fire we’d started. I looked at this strange little man holding a rutabaga, a look of utter pride on his grizzled face.
1pointperspective 
One man’s apple is another man’s rutabaga…
I’ll take the root veggie over the apple anyday. boil it for six or seven hours, mash it, yum.
I’m so going to use the rutabaga line!
Just make sure you use it for good, not evil.
What? That’s no fun.
OK…you can use the rutabaga line for evil, but I want a full report on my desk, uncensored and fully detailed
You got it.
Excellent – I can only hope that your ability to perpetrate evil is on a par with your ability to write about it.
That’s what they’re called! Rutabaga!
Nice… But, rutabaga? is that one of them there RVs (oh wait, that’s a Winnebago).
rutabagas are a delicious treat….one need only peel off the wax, dice them and boil for hours..
You sound like the witch in Hansel and Gretel…except she was into kids, not root vegetables.
gotta cook em just right…
Is this an allegory of the 2012 election?
actually, it was about this woman who was a friend of the family…she was wierd and had big hands…oh wait, i used that one already.
ha! I think so…
interesting…the twist of the fella at the end with the veggie is pretty outside the box… nicely done!
glad you enjoyed it…it wasn’t one of my favorites, but I’ve missed one or two, so I’m feeling somewhat rusty.
Well written, as usual, but they are not a favorite veggie of mine.
Hey you. Be a pal and go to k8edid and vote for my Willie Prader, Private Eye piece.
I have never heard a swede called a rutabaga! Nice piece.
I never heard of a rutabaga called a swede. I had to do a little online research to make sure you weren’t making a derogatory comment about the fine people of Sweden!
Now that is funny :0)
Thanks! Sorry for the delay in acknowledging your compliment, been out of town packing on excess weight.
Interesting. x
thanks. I usually require at least 125 words before I merit an “interesting”
You’re underestimating your talent dear! Or was that a play at humility? heeheehee
Erm, it looks like you’re winning the contest by a mile.
What the hell does a rutabaga look like anyway?
Umm…I just looked at the gluttony contest and I’m in second with 43 votes and first had 61.
A rutabaga can range in size, but is usually slightly bigger than a softball but smaller than a volleyball. The skin is a pale orangish-yellow with large purple patches which look like bruises. The appearance is all that more odd looking because they are coated with wax. Inside, the flesh is a uniform orange color. The texture of the uncooked rutabaga is like a very hard potato. I would never serve a Thanksgiving dinner without boiled, mashed rutabagas. The rutabaga’s flavor has a slight bite to it, so I “cut” them with a few spoonfuls of mashed potatoes to take the edge off. Top them with some gravy, and you’re living large. Accidentally get some on your fork with your oyster stuffing and get ready to swoon.
Hmmm. You were winning by a fairly large margin when I placed my vote last night.
Wow! Turns out I DID win! Now I’ve got to get to work on my acceptance speech. I don’t know what weird link I had, but I appeared to be losing badly every time I looked at it. I’m anticipating a sophomore slump of epic proportions on the second deadly sin submission. Life has been entirely too busy of late, taking me away from my trusty laptop and legions of fan. I promise to do better.
I just checked again and it shows you’ve got over 90 votes. You’re definitely in first place unless this thing is rigged.
Congratulations on your great victory! I’m sure you’re going to want to share those cookies so you can keep your girlish figure.
Thanks! It was fun (but then, winning is always fun). I’m considering being altruistic and deferring cookies in favor of the charitable contribution. In truth, there isn’t an altruistic bone on my big fat body, I’m just more of an oatmeal raisin guy.
Picture Groucho Marx, “This is the tightest story I’ve ever read!”, waving of cigar, eyebrows bouncing! On this freezing morning in the Canadain Prairies, you gave me glee. You get my vote as No. 1 in this challenge. Hey maybe we should start a 100WC Idol!
It’s impossible to dislike any story that includes the word ‘rutabaga’.
much more fun to say than its other name “swede”