Well, here we are on day three already of this Dog Days of Summer grindstone. Sick of dogs yet? Well, tough chew toys, because we’ve got another one coming your way right now. Goes by the name of Lassie. Enjoy it or keep off the furniture.

“Timmy fell down a well” – Really? That crap again?
I’ve been working with a therapist for some time now. Spent a ton of money I really couldn’t afford. Don’t go thinking they let dogs in the Screen Actors Guild back in the golden age of television – ’cause they didn’t.
Anyway my therapist says I’m what you call an “enabler”. She says that me saving Timmy all those times just enabled him to keep living life like a reckless jerk-off; getting lost in the woods, kidnapped by escaped convicts or trapped in an abusive relationship with a gay biker named Otis.
I’m dealing with my own issues. Timmy is Otis’ problem now.
I’m not the only one writing about dogs, these folks are working hard at it too. Don’t get emotional, it’s not like they’re pulling a sled across the Alaskan wilderness and sleeping out in the snow. Click on them and see if I’m lying – my guess is that they’re probably up on the sofa again.
1 Point Perspective – You just read my version of Lassie, but why not click here and look at something else – my attempt at scoring a lucrative book deal by writing porn in my own version of 50 Shades.
When our dogs used to go berserk at imaginary things in the woods behind our giant tree house, we would go into conversations with them. . .
Dogs: WOOF! WOOF!!! OMG, WOOOF!!!
One of us, calmly: What’s that you say? Timmy’s in the well?
(Lather. Rinse. Repeat.)
We cracked ourselves up. The dogs didn’t share our sense of humor. Whatever.
I often say that phrase, or also; “What’s that Timmy, Lassie fell down a well?” – often for no reason whatsoever to no one in particular. I fear there’s something wrong with me.
hahaha!
Ha! We do the same thing with our dogs!
Yep. Did it as a kid – and still do it. Good to know my family and I aren’t the only ones to crack ourselves up. It really never gets old.
There really should be some kind of fund to help canine stars of the golden age of TV come to terms with their issues. Let’s face it. There has to be lots of issues.
It really is amazing how similar our stories are. I really like your “Otis” angle though!
I wrote it then realized that black and white TV viewers from yesteryear may have mistook this Otis for the town drunk over in Mayberry.
So happy to see that we’re letting Lassie off-lease today. Am I the only one to call bitches? *quirked eyebrow*
bitches, neutering…it’s all there, in horrible detail.
“Timmy is Otis’ problem now.”
I laughed so hard at this my kid came running in the room to ask what was so funny. Damn I wish I could tell her.
Shielding her from my blog is good parenting.
I went through the effort of blocking her from mine entirely. There’s still hope for her.
Thank you for bringing this sensitive subject to life. I always knew Timmy was somewhat of a pain in the ass to Lassie.
Don’t even get me started on Shaggy from Scooby Doo. Too much chronic for that Dead Head.
LOVE it! I always thought Lassie could have ended up with a family that caused him/her less stress!
Ditto on the Otis reference. I did think of Andy Mayberry at first. Haven’t commented much, been traveling, but I’ve enjoyed the first posts on your quest!
Lassie certainly would have had issues after saving Timmy so many times.
I honestly don’t know when that poor dog had time for grooming.