The Emperor’s New Prose

Behold the royal yard shoes!  Worn by his majesty whilst cleaning up after the royal pooch.
Behold the royal yard shoes!  Crafted by the artisans in the faraway land of ASICS, these shoes are worn by his majesty when policing the yard for doggy doo.

Hear ye, hear ye!

Dear loyal readers,

My original blog theme was all well and good, much like my old pair of well-worn royal running shoes.  While the theme may have been both familiar and comfortable, as with the aforementioned footwear, it was also starting to stink a little.

This little gem of a house was something I found on the internet.  It's like a blog, only you can live in it.
This little gem of a house was something I found on the internet. It’s like a blog, only you can live in it.  With a place this cool, it doesn’t matter how bad the taste of the resident is.

I’ve moved in a slightly different direction with this new look.  If you have any problem with it, please don’t hesitate to let me know.  I promise to give any constructive criticism the consideration it deserves, but I can’t guarantee that I’ll do a stinking thing about it.  In case you’re interested, I squandered all my blog-theme-upgrade savings on lottery tickets and booze, so I went with one of the free themes (For those of you who enjoy reading blogs but don’t actually blog yourselves, the theme is essentially the typeface and graphic layout and yes, there are actually ones which cost money).

So check it out, kick the tires, see what you think of the new blog crib.  Please use a coaster – I don’t want anyone leaving a ring on the new header.  I made it myself.  It’s comprised of distorted photos of yours truly as well as the oft-ridiculed, slew-footed Lucy.  In addition, there is a frosty snifter of ale which I thoroughly enjoyed on a recent junket down south.

It's all about me, plus three nostril Lucy.
It’s all about me, plus three nostril Lucy.

While you guys look around, I’m going to try to figure out which carton has my toothbrush in it and then decide where to put the sofa and velvet Elvis painting.

Enjoy that new-blog smell before it’s replaced by the all too familiar scents of stale coffee and diesel exhaust.  No matter how snazzy things might appear, I’m going to have to write something to fill this space.  Once I find the toothbrush, I’ll have to find the box I packed my ideas in.

34 thoughts on “The Emperor’s New Prose

  1. OK – – – Mr. Fancy Pants. So you have a blog theme that looks professional and photo tricks up the ying-yang; not to mention the little asides to the left or right of the images. Does that mean I have to change the theme that I have used for the last four years? NO SIR, not at all, – – – !
    I bet you are from New Jersey. Everything in New Jersey is being changed; even the Pulaski Skyway. I am so pleased that you didn’t pay for your new theme because at $1 billion bucks to save the skyway your taxes are about to increase. By the way. Has anyone noticed that Atlantic City is also undergoing change? How’s that working out for you Mr. Smarty Pants?
    You should move here to upstate new york (lower case intentional). Cuomo doesn’t know that we exist (non-existentialism intentional). Our population is dropping faster than an eighty-year old Irishman’s sack-o’-gawea. Our industry has moved to (China, Mexico, Indonesia, Micronesia, Milkomagnesia); take your pick.
    So boo-hoo for me and good luck with your new theme Mr. Chris Christy Pants.
    And one more thing; the only reason I read your blog is because I like it.
    So put that in your hookah and smoke it.
    By the way, your new theme is nice.

    1. Aww Jeez Wally! I didn’t know the Pulaski Skyway was in Jersey! Also, thanks for mentioning hizzonor governor Christie in my comments section, now I have to disinfect it, again!

      1. Oh, but Pulaski Skyway isn’t in New Jersey. It goes over New Jersey, built specifically for those people too delicate to touch the actual New Jersey.

  2. It’s really unfair that you can use your smartphone to change your blog theme, but I can’t use mine to appreciate the change.
    All I saw that your advice was not taken and a few people did leave their drinks on the header.

  3. I’m glad to see that the medication finally kicked in and your creative juices overflowed your beer glass. Don’t mop up…it looks groovy just the way it is. And the background color is my personal favorite shade of blue.

    The color of your eyes perhaps? *grin*

  4. Love, love the new header! The place is so classy now I’m typing with my pinkies extended.

    And stop giving BD so much crap about her great love affair with Keith Urban.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s